Straight through your lover’s heart

Waited too long to land a reservation at Chez Nous, the Driskill, or Romeo’s? Don’t fear! That Other Paper has a few suggestions that will shoot an arrow straight through your lover’s heart (in a good way).

Burlesque Over Broadway

The Parish puts on a great burlesque show dinner theatre for Cupid’s Special Day. Tickets are still available from Frontgate Tickets, so get them while you still can.

7pm | $50 burlesque and dinner; $15 burlesque only

The Parish
214 E 6th St • Austin, TX 78701

Lovebirds’ Dinner/Singles’ Soiree with Kitty Kitty Bang Bang

Kitty Kitty Bang Bang, known around town as the “perfumed posse of wayward women,” will be doing their thing at Stubb’s third annual Beer, BBQ, and Burlesque event. There will be two performances: The first, Lovebirds’ Dinner, is for couples and features both a striptease and dinner; doors and dinner happen at 6:30pm with a performance at 8pm. The later performance billed as a Singles’ Soiree starts at 10pm with a performance at 10:30pm.

6:30pm | $35 general admission; $45 for reservation

10pm | $15 advance tickets; $20 at the door

Stubb’s BBQ
801 Red River • Austin, TX 78701

Alamo Drafthouse Valentine’s Blowout

Sleepless in Seattle Feast

Come watch this romantic comedy classic starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan, long distance minutes to call in not included. A five course feast, however, is included.

7:30pm | $70

Alamo Lake Creek
13729 N Highway 183 • Austin, TX 78750

Harold and Maude Feast

What better way to celebrate Valentine’s Day than checking out a romantic dramedy featuring a 79-year-old con artist and a wealthy teenage boy? Five course feast included.

7pm | $70

Alamo Ritz
320 E 6th St • Austin, TX 78701

Hot Thang! A Valentine’s Ball

This is a full-on Valentine’s Day event that includes an erotic maze, live entertainment (burlesque, performance art, erotic dance, and live music), and cocktails with hors d’oeuvres. Attendees are encouraged to wear sexy costumes and will enjoy a 20% discount on their attire if they rent from Lucy in Disguise. Photographers will be present to document the orgy.

7:30pm | $35 pre-event; $45 at the door

Monarch Event Center
6406 N I-35 • Austin, TX 78752

Stay In

Don’t feel like going out? Don’t worry – the Food Network has some quick and easy last-minute dinner tips. Rent a movie, and the two of you can cuddle for hours while basking in Tom Hanks/Hugh Grant/Sandra Bullock goodness.


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Trohpy’s Fuck Velentines Day with Monument to No One, Exeter, For That Day (Toronto), Co-pilot