Overheard in Austin

Overheard in Austin | Ken’s Donuts

overheard in austin

Ken’s Donuts

Guy to girl “Well, at least your vagina doesn’t smell.”

Overheard in Austin | Unnamed UT dorm

overheard in austin

UT dorm

Guy obviously on steroids to another guy obviously on steroids “Don’t take too many of those estrogen pills or you’ll get bitch tits.”

Overheard by Jackie A.

Overheard in Austin: Ten feet from the UT Tower

overheard in austin

Ten feet from the UT Tower

Guy “I thought it was American History Ten!”

Overheard in Austin | Amy’s Ice Cream

overheard in austin

Amy’s Ice Cream on Guadalupe

Girl to her girlfriends “Now that he and I have been dating a while, we should probably get to know each other.”

Same girl, 10 minutes later “He made a Facebook group for me and Ruth Bader Ginsburg!”

Overheard in Austin | Zen

overheard in austin


Guy to his female co-worker “Uh, no. Duh — I’m a top. I’m a pitcher, not a catcher.”

Overheard in Austin | Original Kerbey Lane

overheard in austin

Kerbey Lane

Annoying girl to her friend “Have you ever heard of a whiskey sour?”

Overheard in Austin | Showdown Saloon

overheard in austin

Showdown Saloon

Guy sitting with his friends on the patio “STEVE HOLT!”

Overheard in Austin | Kerbey Lane

overheard in austin

Kerbey Lane (original)

Sorority girl to her friend “And this is why we have to fight to be exempt from property taxes in West Campus. The huge buildings have ruined everything and are going to make us have to increase our dues. And get this: They want to put in 12-foot sidewalks everywhere. Isn’t that gross?”

Overheard in Austin | Post Office

overheard in austin

Post Office on Northcross

Woman by the PO boxes, to herself “Second notice for what? More bullshit?”

Overheard in Austin | HEB Hancock

overheard in austin

HEB Hancock

Old white man to young black man checking out his groceries “What, you didn’t make the NBA?”

Overheard by Jessica B.

Overheard in Austin | Walgreens

overheard in austin

Walgreens (183 and Duval)

Customer, to her friend “Who gave Danielle Steel her own fragrance?”

Overheard in Austin | Touche

overheard in austin


Guy “She only drinks beer out of a hose.”

Girl “No, a beer bong!”

Overheard by Chanice Jan

Overheard in Austin | Antone’s

overheard in austin

At a concert at Antone’s

Angry older man:[covering his ears] “It’s WAY TOO LOUD in here!”

Overheard in Austin | Texas Union

overheard in austin

While waiting to pay at Chick-fil-A

Chick-fil-A cashier “Excuse me, sir. You can’t take those!” [pointing to ketchup packets]

Man holding Wendy’s bag [stares vacantly into the distance]

Cashier “Well… just this once.”

Overheard in Austin | Sixth and Congress

overheard in austin

Sixth and Congress at 1:20am

Guy, watching a pedicab filled with two guys and two girls slowly go by “Wow, that guy better be getting a huge tip.”

Someone else who saw “I feel sorry for that guy!”

Four people in pedicab [No words, just red faces.]

Overheard in Austin | Austin-Bergstrom International Airport

overheard in austin

On a Continental Airlines flight from Houston to Austin

Passenger to the two guys sitting next to him “You know, back in the day, you couldn’t just switch flights. There were no computers, so they had no way to work that sort of hodgepodge.”

Overheard in Austin | Faulk Central Library

overheard in austin

On the sidewalk in front of the Faulk Central Library at 8th and Guadalupe

Snooty-looking blonde woman to her two little boys “Don’t touch the weirdos!”

Overheard in Austin | Luby’s

overheard in austin


photo / phil_g 

Guy “Why’s it always the princess?”

Girl “Because she’s helpless. And she’s rich.”

Guy “And her virginity’s being threatened by a monster.”

Girl “Do you really think Bowser would have raped her?”

Guy “Are you kidding? Have you seen the spikes on that guy?”

Overheard in Austin | Suzi’s Chinese Kitchen

overheard in austin

Suzi’s Chinese Kitchen

Middle-aged guy eating with his family “With Prison Break, I was like, ‘You broke out of prison – it’s over, guys. Give it up. Just stop.’”

Overheard in Austin | Paramount Theatre

overheard in austin

Paramount Theatre

Guy in line at the bar “If giant ants invaded L.A., I would be totally cool with it.”